MC loves receiving letters from the post and even those who were simply dropped off and thus, she also loves sending and dropping letters. Sometimes we do send those letters per post but most of the time, she would also drop those letters in the mailboxes of her friends.
She would draw and scribble her name and would ask me to help her write down the name of her friend who would be lucky enough to get her letter. And she would work with much love to create that letter.
One time, she saw in my hands a crumpled letter for her. And she cried, 'mama, that was my letter. Why did you destroy it?'
I was surprised because I didnt know it was a letter for her, I simply apologized which she accepted but then I saw tears in her eyes. That was when she bawled with much disappointed because she said, 'you know, mama, sometimes I also drop my letters to my friends and sometimes they would also throw my letters to them because they said they dont like them. Why should they do that? And you know I always keep their letters for me.'
Aww, I gave her a big hug and pointed to her that she did say 'sometimes'. Sometimes her friends might not be in a good mood that is why they simply throw things away. Sometimes her friends might simply not understand that she is giving it as a special gift that is why they throw her letters away. And I had to explain to her that sometimes, she might give a special value to something and yet someone might not give the same value to that something.
I also pointed out that her friends are different from her. She loves keeping things and her friends might not love keeping things. And I added, she would soon find out more differences for as long as they are growing up together.
I hope I did good with my explanations.
5 comments:
awwww your girl is slowly learning the frustrations of this world. yup she is growing up and soon there will be more sad things coming her way, but it would make her stronger and wiser and more tolerable/understanding of the world around her especially with a mom like you :)
Mary is used to making things for me, her dad, sister, grandma and her friends in her daycare and school and they were ALWAYS appreciated. Her friends in the States are used to doing this for each other so they know to say thank you. And then when we got here in Manila, Mary would draw and make letters for her cousins and new friends. The cousins knew enough to say thank you and reciprocate (they are older than mary) but her new friends? Not only did they not appreciate mary's efforts but outright said that mary's drawings did not look good and that they did not like them. It was tough explaining to her that there are people that will not always appreciate them or what she gives them or like you said, will not value things the same way as she did.
You did good.
toni - it is not easy but we need to try to at least explain and explore with them esp when it comes to such frustrations.
marysmom - it is painful to see their disappointments and i think we both did good and let's hope our kids think so too.
It is difficult to teach about individual differences. It all depends on how we view and interpret actions. Sure the children get hurt but it is difficult to explain this to them but in time,they will be able to understand.
And because of disappointment she will learn to be stronger. She will overcome whatever circumstances comes on her way ! And she will understand that we are all different.
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